Well it seems that Covid is putting the kybosh on wedding plans again, so how about we rethink the whole concept of ‘bigger is best’ and go for quality rather than quantity! In essence this is a micro wedding. After all, what are you getting wed for? Is it for you and your partner, or for all those lovely guests to have a big knees-up afterwards?
Let’s face it, one of the reasons we want to have that amount of people is because it makes the party go with a bang!
But what about the importance of the ceremony itself? Surely that bit is the most important part of any wedding; the part where the bride and groom are betrothed to one another, where they say their all-important vows and symbolically pledge themselves to one another.
Of course it is important to have witnesses to your event, but does it have to be hundreds or could it be just a few well-chosen people?
So with this in mind – maybe it’s time to rethink the colossal wedding and go micro instead!
What is a micro wedding?
A micro wedding is one where around up to 20 people are invited to a smaller ceremony and celebration. While I am currently writing this, here in the UK, weddings have been banned altogether, but it is expected that things will open up again soon (fingers crossed).
With some people feeling anxious about attending large gatherings, maybe this idea can help some of your guests to feel more comfortable- knowing that the whole day will be a much smaller affair.
Let’s be clear about all this – a micro wedding is not to be confused with an intimate wedding where the guest list could actually run to 30 – 60 people! Nor should you think micro weddings are something to do with elopement where a couple run away and get wed in secret with just a couple of witnesses. Often an elopement consists of just a quick visit to a registry office to sign papers – there is no ceremony as such and no elaborate elements, vows or promises made. So what might a micro wedding look?
Micro weddings debunked
For a start, the venue for a micro wedding can be a lot smaller – you only have up to 20 people remember, so pick a nice intimate venue where the atmosphere lends itself to a more personal approach. Private rooms in pubs and restaurants can often be a good option, or take a punt on having your ceremony outside.
Many places offer the option to have an outdoor ceremony in their grounds. Perhaps an outdoor wedding in a bluebell wood, or if you really want to push the boat out altogether (no pun intended!) have a ceremony on the beach!
Alternatively, seek out a house to hire and make a weekend of it. A celebrant can come to any venue you choose and perform your wedding ceremony, so go ahead and book that house in the country! The micro wedding doesn’t have to be a come-down, in fact, in many ways, it lends itself to being a more creative and meaningful event.
More time for you and your guests
Have you ever been to a wedding and not spoken more than two words to the bride and groom all day? When there are hundreds of guests at a wedding the bride and groom often don’t get to spend any meaningful time with any of them. This is such a shame as these guests must be very important to the bride and groom – otherwise they wouldn’t have been invited!
With a micro wedding you wont have this problem. With a smaller guest-list you are going to have all the time you need to speak to each and every one of your guests. These conversations will be more meaningful and unhurried allowing a more relaxed atmosphere for everyone to enjoy.
Could a micro wedding save you money?
The micro wedding, by its very nature, is a smaller event and therefore will save you money in the long-run. However you may want to redistribute this saved money and splash out on a more expensive wine list or gourmet meal and chef to cook it. This could elevate your event to something spectacular in terms of food and drink and something that might not be possible with lots more guests!
The cake will not necessarily need to be a three tiered tower if you have only 20 guests to feed – so you have already saved some money there too. By all means if you want the enormous cake and have your heart set on cutting it after the speeches, then go ahead! But the beauty of the micro wedding is you can ditch the traditions if you want to and go completely rogue. This will certainly make your wedding the unique experience that people will remember.
Of course, if you are happy with all the original plans but on a smaller scale then why not think about putting that saved money into the honeymoon of a lifetime!
Have your micro wedding the way you want it
Ultimately it’s your day- have it any way you want it! With a micro wedding you will have more flexibility to do things your way with less interference from Aunty Mary or Uncle Tom, or be restrained by tradition.
Although it may feel like your wedding has been hijacked by Covid, in reality this may have offered you a golden opportunity to rethink the whole event. Of course there will be a period of adjustment and possibly grief to deal with at the loss of your planned event (I covered cancelled weddings and mental health in a previous blog), but if you can get beyond this and work out another way to have your day with the closest and dearest people to you – I’m sure that party will still go with a bang!
Please let me know if you are planning a micro wedding – or if you have other ideas about how to beat the restrictions around weddings during covid please get in touch. I would love to talk through any of your ideas.